just another night at the Roller Derby

I attended my first Roller Derby last night.

Picture two teams of mean, tattooed, punk girls with names like Dee Stroya, Sharon Needles and Juanna Rumble skating around a circle, pushing, elbowing and body-slamming each other. I first thought it resembled WWF wrestling with the exaggerated personas and staged violence, until I saw one skater drag another down by reaching up and grabbing her skate - then throwing a punch at her when she was down. I realized these women are tough, a little scary, and certainly having a blast.

The rules are easy enough for a newcomer (myself) to follow and get into. The whistle blows, and the pack of skaters begins slowly moving around the track. A second whistle blows and a skater from each team, known as the jammers, then take off, skating - or trying to skate - through the pack once; then on the second time around they get a point for each opposing skater they pass. Throw in some pushing, blocking, and lots of falls and slides and you've got Roller Derby. Last night there were two games, with four teams total on the Windy City Rollers league.

I was hooked. The undefeated Hells Belles barely held on to their title against the Manic Attackers in a neck-and-neck action-packed game, and the Fury took a severe beating from the Double Crossers.

It drew a huge crowd at the Congress Theater, with people drinking beer from cans, holding "Manic Attackers" signs and yelling things like "Get a body bag" when a girl would go down. There were relay games for audience members to win prizes at half time, a long table of judges for the game and even an announcer dressed in a dark suit. And of course, a team of medics waiting on the sidelines.

Talking to a bartender at a bar later that night, he said he knows some of these women, and they are teachers and cocktail waitresses and normal women with a kick-ass hobby. And looking into it today, I found there are dozens of leagues all over the country, each complete with clever mean-girl personas and sexy derby uniforms.

In Chicago, they play the second Sunday of each month, and the championships are in November. I think I'm rooting for the Hells Belles.